It has been a long time now since i moved to myspace and now that no one reads this anymore this is a journal.... and if you are reading this.... please dont...

So today is the first day with out dana by my side all the time now...
its so... diffrent...
its nice to feel me again.. i missed me so much...
i wish i could have just been me the whole time  and not screwed this up...
10 years from now im gonna look back at this page and im gonna realize that maybe i was dumb for making such a big deal out of something so little...
but by this it is probably gonna be the same as before  we started hanging out all the time...
cause hell the little i did she her during the relationship, we didnt do anythign and that was us... thats always been us...   its just during that time i wasnt me...
scared paranoid  i dont even know... but now i feel like i did lose her...  not like as a friend  but as someone im close to because i know now i am going to feel more like she doesnt want me around...  the idea that we had to break up in my mind says 2 much...  i dont knwo if thats it but... its what im feeling... i hope she still wants me around... but worst of what im feeling is i know she wont call to hang out...
she may im be thats all we will be again...
like before where we would always talk and we were close but never saw eachother...
i hated those days... cause, i cared about her and i just wanted to be around her and this was an amazing 5 months...
i saw her so much and... i know maybe its a good thing we did this now before i get more attached ....
before im not sure what to do...
but im so aimless....
i dont knwo many people at the hs anymore i can talk to and feel comfortable around..
its gonna take time to get use to...
before bein g with dana i felt like it was ok if i came and joined in on the chat with her friends now i feel even more out of the loop..
truthfully   I want to go to millersville so bad now...
im tired of this nazo crap    every year someone finds a way to mess with my head or heart....   and i just dont know what im doing anymore....
i know i feel great and all again but how long will i last that way...
how long can i take now human contact...
I am a loner once again....
  End..

Yeah im going to make this my end xanga for a very prolonged period of time.
I dont have the time to get one here enough thanks to my money maker, and classes.

Its just i dont think its worth waisting ym time and all of your time to breifly tell you of how ive been.
And some of it you probably couldnt understand.
But yeah
So im going to say fairwell i dotn knwo if ill ever put up a new entry, probably will, But if i dont .
Heres to all of the people who have ever commented me, read this or who dont anymore and at one time did.
This is for you   good luck with everything and i hope you dont die to soon...
Yall rock..